Health Insurance Underwriter (National Association of Health Underwriters)

January 2006

Poor writing can hurt productivity

By Jack E. Appleman, CBC

If you don't think bad writing can cost your company time and money, think again. Ambiguous emails, confusing client letters and dull new business proposals all spell inefficiency and ultimately a worse bottom line. Poor writing is a disease spreading not only in the insurance arena but also throughout virtually all industries. According to rding to rding to rding to rding to The New York Times (Dec. 7, 2004), "What Corporate America Can't Build: A sentence," one third of employees in blue chip companies wrote poorly..

The good news is that business writing is a learned skill, so employees at all levels-from producers and CSRs to agency principals-can learn to significantly enhance their writing proficiency.

New approach to writing

Why do some insurance professionals speak much better than they write? Their spoken words are crisp, concise and convincing while their text is choppy, verbose and often confusing. If you fall into this category, try this: Before writing the next document, imagine how you would explain the key points in a 60-second conversation with a colleague. What happens? You're forced to write concisely, with a minimum of words. That's the way you should approach writing-as if you've got the reader's attention for only one minute. In a world where everyone is growing more inpatient and the average person is exposed to more than 3,000 marketing messages a day, you need to get to the point immediately. Otherwise, you'll lose readers' attention in a hurry.

Let go of high school/college English

Think back to that English assignment from years past-an essay of at least 1,000 words, which must include some new vocabulary words. So you cranked out long-winded sentences, inserted complex words and often repeated the same thoughts. Only one thing mattered-reaching that magic 1,000!

What a terrible way to write effectively. To those who still write a business letter like an essay on Dickens, it's time to get simple. Use as few words as possible-and use simple words. Few clients, prospects or even co-workers today are impressed by fancy words anymore. They just want you to get to the point.

Planning a writing training

Considering that most of your staff probably hasn't had any writing training since high school or college, the solution could be a business writing training tailored to the needs of your employees. Once you determine the people who most need to improve their writing-which could mean everyone!-select an instructor, either from within the company or a qualified instructor, preferably one with experience in the insurance industry.

Then request sample documents from those registered for the writing workshop, anything from letters to insurance departments and internal emails to new business proposals. Also solicit feedback from their supervisors.

Sit down with the writing instructor to review samples and identify common problems, so the training can be tailored to the needs of the participants. Consider whether a half-day or full-day training would work best. Limit the size of each group workshop to 15 to 20 people. If possible, incorporate individualized instruction with the trainer-which can prove critical in giving the personal touch to those less willing to share their problems in a group setting.

Writing skills to cover

Below are some of the skills to cover in a writing training, along with examples of good and bad copy:

Be clear-don't make the reader guess key details.
Unclear

The deadline for getting the mailing out at a lower rate is nearing, at the end of November, so it would be appreciated if you could provide me with the necessary data well in advance, at least two weeks or so before.

Clear

To qualify for the lower mailing rates, please provide me with the data by Nov. 16, two weeks before the Nov. 30 deadline.
Be concise-delete unnecessary words.
Wordy

The claims manager's report was carefully illustrated. The document was five pages long.

Concise

The claims manager's five-page report was carefully illustrated.

Be compelling-use dynamic words to convey enthusiasm for your ideas.

Ordinary

With the right telemarketing campaign, we can have 15% more revenues, which will put our agency on a better level.

Compelling

With the right telemarketing campaign, we can boost revenues by 15% and propel our agency to new heights.

Master emails-use proper grammar and compelling subject lines

E-mail, which can be, at the same time, the biggest asset and the biggest detriment to a business, is a grossly misused and underutilized tool. The biggest mistake in e-mail communication is cheating on capitalization, punctuation and other grammatical rules-which all reflect poorly on the author. Write an email like any other document, making it as concise as possible.

To get others to pay more attention to your emails, write specific subject lines, which could include suggested action steps. This will prompt readers to open your message sooner.

Which one of the emails below would you click on first?

Vague subject line:

Report on Sept. sales

Specific subject line:

Sept. sales up 20%/continue magazine ads
Edit carefully-put yourself in the reader's shoes.

While it's always easier to find wordy sentences, grammatical errors and redundancies in someone else's writing, you need to learn to edit your own text. Good writers can put themselves in the readers' shoes to ensure that the key points come across. Editing includes reviewing for spelling and grammar, reviewing for overall flow and proofreading for dumb old typos.

Evaluation & ongoing training

Immediately after the group workshop, all participants should complete evaluations. Then, in the next few weeks, ask employees and their supervisors for some gut reactions on how much difference the training has made and whether additional group or one-on-one sessions should be scheduled. Talk to the instructor about ongoing programs to monitor the progress of some or all of the participants, through email and phone.

For too many individuals in the insurance industry and in the rest of the corporate world, writing has been a forgotten skill. But the right training can dramatically improve writing skills so the entire company wins-through greater efficiency, higher productivity, improved morale and all those good things that lead to a better bottom line.

About the author

Jack E. Appleman, CBC, president of the Monroe, NY-based SG Communications, LLC, teaches professionals in the insurance industry and other fields to write better so they're more productive. An award-winning writer and 25-year communications specialist, Appleman also teaches communication skills at Fairleigh Dickinson University and at William Paterson University in New Jersey. He can be reached at 845-782-2419 (jack@sgwriting.com).

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